A Brief Rant

For the most part I’ve come to terms with the fundamentalist upbringing I had. Then someone I know goes and says or does something really stupid and/or hurtful. Then I get mad.

Having a parent tell you, “I miss the ‘real’ you,” or something else to imply that you aren’t actually yourself, in your right mind, happy etc. is very hurtful. Having an old friend say they’ll pray for you because “I know that, deep-down inside, you still really believe and you’re just going through a hard time right now” is insulting. It all is insulting. I am a rationale human being who made a decision to stop believing in something (in this case the inspiration of the Bible and Christianity as THE religion, etc.). I did not become a horrible, crazy, delusional person overnight. I can and am happy, and yes it’s REAL happiness. Christians don’t have a monopoly on happiness (or joy, if you buy into the thinking that they are two separate things), just as Buddhists don’t have a monopoly on peaceful living. Absolutist thinking is harmful to humanity. Absolutism is a hallmark of racism, sexism, and all the horrible things that come along with such ideology.

Anyway.

Be careful what you say. Don’t idealize and idolize a person’s past existence (or anything for that matter). Be happy for those who find happiness, even if they find it in a different way than you have (so long as no actual harm is being done, of course). We aren’t cookies, we’re people! We’re all different, sharing the world but living separate, unique lives. Show some respect!

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2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Clyde
    Feb 11, 2013 @ 02:43:55

    Very well said! I spent a lot of time with fundamentalists in my youth and this shaped me; though not the way such folk intended.

    Reply

  2. forgedimagination
    Feb 11, 2013 @ 15:45:57

    II experience this all the time, even though I’m still a fairly orthodox Christian… Mostly. 🙂 I get things like “realism isn’t a biblical worldview” or “don’t you trust God to take care of the needy through his ordained method?” Or “you only think you’re egalitarian.” Or “you’re just seeing sexism everywhere because you’re a radical feminist.”

    It’s… Frustrating, to have my hard-won independent thoughts completely dismissed.

    Reply

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